As a young girl growing up in the South, in a Pentecostal church, I was conditioned to believe that resolutions were promises “saved” people just didn’t make. In some ways, making a New Years resolution was akin to lying. Of course, no one in their right mind wants to be called a liar. So, I stayed as far away from making resolutions as possible. As I became an adult, I began to see the correlation of resolutions and lies, as it pertained to my personal journey. Over the years, I have made well-intentioned promises to myself. Some I’ve kept, but most I’ve not. As this first day of this new year comes to a close, I find myself thinking of the past year and how I have no plans of making resolutions for this one or any other one..
The past year was one of great peaks and valleys. The peaks left me feeling unstoppable. The valleys could at times, take my breath away and cause me to long for Jesus’ return. It wasn’t so much a resolution as a statement of fact… I don’t exactly remember when I came to the conclusion.. I just know that it was somewhere in mid to late 2014. I distinctly recall telling myself that I would make a conscious effort to say no, and say it often, in the year 2015. This is not to be confused with random naysaying, but rather, the careful consideration of a proposed question, and the informed decision to say no. I began to excel at this newfound use of this basic word, which expels so much force as it leaves the lips. Unfortunately, for quite some time, I had a knack for saying yes, to my heart, and others’ opinions, when I should have been saying no, because God and my gut, told me so. In case you are considering trying this as an exercise, please note… Many people will hate you for saying no. But, it’s ok. Do you. Say no when you need to. I know this is counter-productive to what our culture deems politically correct, but saying yes, especially when God is warning you to say no, will have you all hemmed up in no time. Trust me on this.
Last year also brought to light, the misunderstanding of another big word. Relationship. Now, this can be intimate, as in familial, spousal, BFF-al(totally a word I may have just made up), or even professional or spiritual. Whatever types of relationships you may find yourself in, this realization may just fit. Not everyone views relationships in the same way. Case in point.. Just because you are related to other humans and want to build stronger bonds and make memories, does not, I repeat, DOES NOT assure that they will feel the same. You may find that you are in a professional relationship and the other party is not as invested in the business as you would prefer. Not everyone you attend church or bible study with is perpetually daydreaming of having a coffee date with you. So, sometimes, we just have to get over it. Does it hurt, yes, often, but we can’t force people to share our beliefs and feelings. Experience is a good teacher.
Commitment was another big word thrown around in 2015, but may not have meant much to some. Usually when I commit myself to something, especially if it is to benefit someone else, I am all in. But, for some reason, when it comes to commitments to benefit myself, I more often than not, fall short. Kinda reminds me of well-intended resolutions. This may or may not include, losing weight, writing this blog, discontinuing my horrible habit of nail-biting, and any other thing that looms in my over-active brain. I don’t mean to be irresponsible in the commitment arena, I just somehow find myself scaling the walls frequently. I’m fairly certain I can resolve to rectify that.
So far, 2016 is off to a great start. Even though I have already heard of several deaths, life-threatening illness and looming death, I am alive to see at least the first day. So, I can’t complain. Make resolutions. Don’t make resolutions. Do what makes you happy. Unless it’s illegal or immoral. You should probably stay away from those types of things. But, choose to be better. Happy. Healthy. Whole… Spiritually. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Love. Give. Smile.. Often.
apeaceofmine 